I was diagnosed with stage III bowel cancer at the end of 2014 at age 28. I’m a primary school teacher and at the time had just started a new job at an amazing school in Melbourne.
Before I was diagnosed, I had really painful cramps and was severely constipated for a while and twice ended up at emergency in hospital. By the second emergency department visit I was vomiting and could hardly eat. I was in a lot of pain so they said I should get a colonoscopy. That colonoscopy was how my tumor was found.
My husband Jamie was with me at the doctor’s appointment when I found out. I remember just bursting into tears and the feelings of disbelief. You go through stages of crying, feelings of fear and weirdly almost wanting to laugh with the feeling of “Is this real? Is this really happening to me? Did I not eat the right food?” At the time, I was a healthy, active 28-year-old.
Following my diagnosis I had a sub-total colectomy (an operation to remove to remove part of the colon), followed by six months of chemotherapy.
Chemotherapy takes a toll in many ways, mentally and physically. Chemo brain is a real thing! You get forgetful and a bit fuzzy. My hair thins, but the drugs I am on thankfully do not cause full hair loss. The nausea isn’t great.
In late 2015, I was diagnosed with secondary bowel cancer, and had another major operation, with part of my liver removed, both ovaries removed and a lot of clearing of tumours in my peritoneum. I also had HIPEC (heated intra-peritoneal chemotherapy) during this operation.
Our wedding date was set 21 days after the operation, but Jamie and I decided not to postpone, as we had been planning it for over a year. So despite many worried family and friends telling us to hold off, we got married on New Year’s Eve in 2015. The wedding was on our farm in NSW, so that was really special.
It was pretty funny because most brides stress about their dresses and putting on weight, whereas I had lost weight because of the operation and my dress didn’t actually fit properly at the back.
I was on painkillers and I had a wound all the way from my chest down to below my undie line. But I could walk—walking down the aisle with my dad was amazing.
Jamie and I walked into our wedding reception to Pharrell Williams’ song “Happy!” That one was my choice.
We are so glad we followed our hearts, especially seeing as I had to have another six months of chemo at the start of 2016. So it was a great lesson to us to live in the moment.
We had always assumed that we would have children at some stage, but we hadn’t planned on having children in the time before we were married.
Before my chemotherapy, the doctor recommended that I harvest my eggs because chemotherapy can affect your fertility. Luckily, there was a window after my first operation before I started chemotherapy, so I do have eggs that are frozen.
Sadly, after my second operation, both of my ovaries were removed. I can’t have children naturally now, but I can still carry a child, so IVF is definitely a possibility for us. Surrogacy is also an option, but at the moment, I’m just going through treatment.
I try now to work really hard on my mindset, diet, exercise and seeing the good in everything. I really focus moving daily, as well as taking supplements and getting acupuncture to support my immune system.
Being diagnosed with cancer and going through operations and treatment really changes the way you look at life and how you live your life.
I went through a stage, probably about two years ago, where I really did get anxious and depressed. Questions like “Why do I have cancer?” and “How do I deal with it?” You have to put time into working through things.
Sometimes you feel really isolated during cancer treatment, like no one around you can fully understand. But I’ve been really lucky to connect with a new friend that I met through an old friend, about the same age as me, who is sadly going through a similar thing. It’s really helpful chatting to them, having a bit of a moan every now and then and knowing the other knows exactly how it feels.
Jamie and I have never been closer and try to support each other in every way. In a lot of ways our situation has only made us stronger!
Sometimes you feel really isolated during cancer treatment, like no one around you can fully understand.
We have recently moved from Melbourne to a small farm near Birregurra. We also have four chooks, two pet goats, and two dairy calves we are hand rearing. We are hoping to run goats and cattle on our farm soon.
We also have a six month old Golden Labrador puppy called Margaret. Margaret and I walk every morning. We are totally besotted with her!
Sadly my secondaries has returned, in my liver and lungs. I was on a clinical trial at the start of this year which unfortunately was unsuccessful, so I have gone back onto chemotherapy in the last month to try to keep my cancer under control.
The doctors have told us that the chemotherapy and immunotherapy drugs I am on will not cure my cancer, but it is hoped they will keep it under control, from growing or spreading further at this stage.
Knowing there is no cure for my cancer is really hard. That’s why we’ve started a little fundraiser group called ‘Research4Riney’. Riney is one of my nicknames.
I feel like fundraising for research is something proactive and positive that I can do. Jamie and I feel that it is a way we can try to help not only me but others too.
We are going to host different fundraisers in the next few months, with all funds raised going to Bowel Cancer Australia, Peter MacCallum Cancer Foundation and The Jodi Lee Foundation. Jamie and some family and friends are also going to participate in the Jodi Lee Trek 2017 in September.
I think an important message to take away for anyone is that anybody can get cancer, even if you are young and otherwise healthy.
I think lifestyle and diet play an important role. I love the saying “positive mind, positive vibes, positive life”.
Eating less meat, especially processed meat is important, as well as including a lot more veggies, especially leafy greens—eat the rainbow! Stress is a really dangerous thing, which can affect your health in many ways.
You don’t think when you’re 28 that you’re going to get cancer, but at the end of the day you only have one body and that’s been a really important lesson for me.
Common symptoms of bowel cancer can include:
* Bleeding from the rectum
* Anaemia
* Changes in bowel habit
* Abdominal pain or cramping
* Bloating
* Weight loss
* Unexplained fatigue
You can follow @research4riney on Instagram and donate to Research4Riney here.
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