And just like that, another season of The Bachelor Australia has come to an end with Matt Agnew choosing Chelsie as his winner. While Australians collect their bets, it’s easy to forget that someone is watching the show back, seeing the person they thought they were going to leave with break up with them.
Though Abbie Chatfield wasn’t everyone’s cup of tea, that doesn’t make what she went through any easier. In the wake of the finale, the 23-year-old took to Instagram to write an emotional post, saying she was completely blindsided when Matt didn’t choose her.
“The only way I can describe this moment is complete and utter shock,” she wrote alongside a photo of her standing with Matt. “I was numb. I couldn’t and didn’t want to feel anything. I had felt for weeks that what Matt and I had was real and I trusted him wholeheartedly when he told me how he felt about me.”
From Hometowns, I forgot the cameras were there. It didn’t feel like we were filming a show at all, it felt like we had this real relationship built in a little bubble of ‘The Bachelor’ and we would be out soon and able to live a normal life,” she continued. “Hearing Matt say ‘my heart is with someone else’ reminded me that we were filming and that Matt had to make a difficult decision, and he did not see in me what I saw in him.”
“I felt silly for ever imagining Matt would love me. It was like emotional whiplash. I was so confused and it felt like I was in a dystopian reality. The second the cameras turned off, I sobbed. I screamed. I couldn’t breathe. I didn’t think think this would be how we would end. I spent weeks crying about this relationship that had almost no closure.”
She finished by saying that she still hasn’t completely healed, but that she’s happy for Matt and Chelsie. “I know he and the gorgeous woman he is with are happy, and that’s all that matters.”
This article originally appeared on InStyle Australia
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