If one of your New Year’s resolutions was to prioritise your relationships—congratulations, you’re in the right place. We sought the counsel of psychologist, and founder of The Relationship Room, Rachel Voysey, to share her practical tips for those wanting to improve their relationships. Whether you want to reconnect with friends or reignite your intimacy with your partner, here’s some free advice from a professional.
1. To be closer to my partner
Set a monthly check-in over a glass of wine or a meal. Both partners can share what they feel is going well and identify an area that could be improved. Add in some date nights, and in 12 months you should feel the spark again!
2. To revive drifting friendships
Reach out to friends and check in even when a face-to-face catch up is just not on the cards. This keeps the most important part of the connection healthy and alive until you can get back to having fun together.
3. To improve my relationship with myself
Pay attention to your inner dialogue – work towards cultivating positive self-talk and practicing self compassion. Treat yourself with the same care and understanding that you would a friend.
4. If you want to prioritise family time
Open a discussion with your family about realistic expectations and what matters most to each person. Speaking about this as a family can be a nice way to support each other and be more intentional with your time together.
5. If you want to set better boundaries
Start by saying, “I’m not sure that is going to work for me, let me have a think about it and get back to you.” That gives you time to check in with yourself about what matters and then muster up the strength to say no. There is an inherent buzz when you respect yourself enough to set and maintain boundaries so practise, practise, practise, but don’t be too hard on yourself if it takes some time.
Why is it so important to maintain relationships?
I love Esther Perel’s quote, “The quality of your life ultimately depends on the quality of your relationships.” Taking the time to pour love and attention into them means we are the driver of our own happiness and wellbeing.
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