Five tips to help you start feeling more confident, starting right now.
- Fail fast. Dipping your toe in “failure waters” and learning to fail – if only in fast, little, bite-size ways – is how we learn. “Little failures are part of success,” says Shipman.
- Leave the comfort zone. Taking action, especially when action is risky, builds confidence. You can start small – anything is better than inaction.
- Stop ruminating. Dwelling on the negative and nightmare scenarios is the fastest way to undermine self-confidence. Although you might not be able to always eliminate NATs (Negative Automatic Thoughts), you can begin by acknowledging them. “It may sound tedious, but keep a journal and write them down,” propose the authors. “The most effective and surprisingly easy fix is to look for an alternative point of view. Just one different interpretation can open the door for confidence.”
- Learn to own your triumphs. Stop attributing achievements to chance, and learn to accept compliments. “When praised, reply: ‘Thank you, I appreciate that.’ It’s surprising how powerful saying those five words will feel,” say Shipman and Kay.
- Meditate. “A calm brain is the ultimate confidence tool,” explain the authors. A brain on meditation is literally rewired. “Your fear centre, the amygdala, shrinks. You have an increased ability to control your emotions and to be clear, and calm, about your goals.”
Taken from The Confidence Code: The Science and Art of Self-Assurance – What Women Should Know by Katty Kay and Claire Shipman.