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The 5 Love Languages: Discover What Yours Says About You

Because love is a wonderful thing.
Two best friends telling secrets lying in the grass

When marriage counsellor Dr. Gary Chapman released his book The 5 Love Languages in 2007, he couldn’t have imagined he’d still be on the New York Times bestseller list 17 years later. But he struck a chord worldwide with his ground-breaking summaries of the five different ways in which we like to receive love, with his five love languages becoming part of the lexicon and a framework for understanding our relationships today.

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The love languages of acts of service, receiving gifts, physical touch, words of affirmation and quality time, are what make us feel loved. See which one resonates with you.

1. Acts of Service

If your love language is acts of service, the words “let me help you with that” will make your heart sing. A partner who shows up for you when you’re busy, stressed or tired by taking some of your load is the way to your heart. Whether it’s walking your dog when you’re feeling under the weather or making you a cup of tea in the morning, these helpful kindnesses show you they care.

2. Receiving Gifts

For some lovers, tangible gestures count. Not to be mistaken for materialism, the receiver of gifts places importance on the consideration and thoughtfulness behind the gift.

Fragrance is a deeply personal gift that tells your significant other ‘I know you’ and ‘I love you’.

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Say it with scent. The elegant red Coach Love bottle with its turnlock top, classic gold hardware and sweetheart charm makes a luxurious declaration of love. (RRP $178.00). Image: Supplied.

Inspired by all the ways we express love, Coach Love embodies this love language, from its red, curved bottle to its notes of wild strawberry and juicy mandarin, the richness of velvet rose and jasmine sambac at its heart, and the warmth of cedarwood and amber.

3. Physical Touch

More than just sexy time, for some people, frequent physical touch is essential to feel closeness and intimacy. From kisses to pats, hugs and holding hands, these lovers take a hands-on approach.

Make sure you communicate clearly about what degree of touch you feel is appropriate and comfortable for both of you and and enjoy those cosy nights in, snuggling on the sofa.

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For some, touch is more than intimacy, it’s a necessity to feel loved. Image: Getty.

4. Words of Affirmation

For you, actions don’t necessarily speak louder than words. An unsolicited compliment or some kind words of praise will fill your cup and make you feel loved and appreciated.

If the one you love is an affirmation fan, or you just feel like spreading a little bit of random joy, these Kindness Cards from the Collective Hub come in a cute pack of 52 beautifully designed cards you can pop in your partner’s gym bag to find later, or sneak one onto a cute stranger’s windscreen to brighten their day.

Words are powerful and can mean the world to someone you love. Image: The Iconic
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5. Quality Time

If you feel truly loved when your partner’s phone is down, their eyes are on you and you have their undivided attention, then your love language is quality time. Being present and in the moment counts, as well as meaningful conversations, and one on one experiences together with minimal distractions to show you that you are special.

Whatever your love language, whoever and however you choose to love, remember to embrace every opportunity to give and receive love, because it makes the world a better place.

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